Just read my post (see previous “My Mother’s . . . Abduction?”) to my spouse. He and I have had several weird UFO related experiences together, including missing time, as well as our own in childhood, before we ever met.
When I got to the part about my mother talking about “the beeping” and my own beeping sounds in my head, Jim says, casually, “I’ve had that beeping too.”
After forty plus years of marriage, you think you know it all.
So dear, tell me more about this beeping!
When I first discovered the internet; many years ago, I went after skeptics. I had many a name for these debunkers. “Skeptoids,” “skeptic-bunkies,” and more. I had Yahoo groups (remember them?) devoted to bashing skeptics. Blogs that went after them with a vengeance. Argued with them, and, was the victim of their pathological insanity. I was called many names, insulted, lied about, and threatened. (With violence, with rape.)
I would count up the astounding number of links on the JREF forum relating to Bigfoot — so many dozens of links attacking the existence of Bigfoot! For a creature that skeptics insist isn’t real, there were sure (and no doubt still are; haven’t checked in a long time) a lot of threads devoted to Sasquatch.
Finally, I quite. Started using my own, real, legal name on-line. Partly because, in using my own name, that would hold me accountable to myself. Also, letting others know: this is me. Who I am. Really, truly me.
As it is now. Still me.
After awhile, things died down, and they’re still fairly quiet in that realm. But overall, lately, there has been an uptick in the skeptical world. Lots of links (see Anomalist, and Coast to Coast, etc. for links) to skeptics and anti-skeptics.
Things don’t change. They rest, they retreat for a moment, but after a while, they return. Skeptics are always with us. Still showing their ignorance, their smugness, their refusal to consider — seriously, and more importantly, honestly, — the subject they’re refuting.
Finally, I’d like to say, to para-phrase, “nobody believes in ghosts, until they’ve seen one.” Except, even in those cases, I know that’s not true. I’ve met a few who have seen ghosts, heard them, felt them, along with members of their family, and still refuse to acknowledge their existence. I’ve had people walk out of the room, rather than talk about the things they’ve seen, be it UFOs or strange creatures or ghosts. I’ve had people refuse to talk about the very things the rest of their loved ones have seen, as they themselves had. Their love for their family — siblings, spouses, etc. — isn’t enough to cancel out their fear, or refusal, to accept the anomaly. (And by the way, I have seen and heard ghosts, many a time.)
A question that intrigues me, but at the same time, I don’t pay much attention to anymore. I don’t argue. I don’t explain. Not now. Not anymore.
I will happily discuss my experiences. But explain? Justify? Apologize? Nope.
It is not my job to convince you. I don’t want to convince anyone. I simply tell my story. My truth. It is up to you — your choice — if you believe me, or care to honestly engage with me.
Otherwise, buzz off.
(cross posted at my Frame 352: The Stranger Side of Sasquatch blog)
Cleaning out my study; lots of old files, and books, and all kinds of stuff. Had. forgotten all about a little journal I started in 1978 or so about my UFO experiences. Here’s one about a dream I had:
The dream: [edited for clarity] Date: June 29, 1978
Night time, Los Angeles. I’m standing on the corner across from my mother’s house. (interesting I wrote “my mother’s house” seems an odd way to phrase that. It’s the house I grew up in. Also, the house where my mother saw a UFO, and became very excited, calling us kids to come out and look at “the flying saucer.” No one believed her — except me. In fact, I told not to worry when the UFO was no longer visible. “Don’t worry mom, they’ll be back. They always come back.”)
I look up to the sky, and see very clearly, a large rectangle and another shape, thicker than the first. they are zooming through the air quickly and quietly. The UFOs break apart and disappear over a hill. (No hills however where I grew up.) Now I see flashes of light, and the sounds of machine guns. I know however that that’s not what is making the sound — it’s not the ‘guns’ it’s something else.
People on the street stop to look towards the sounds. I try to tell them what I saw: UFOs. Some believe me, some don’t. To be expected.
Suddenly, as we’re discussing what’s happening, a very large crescent of light comes floating through the sky, very fast. It’s heading towards the direction of the ‘machine gun’ sounds. The sounds stop. The UFOs come back in their original direction, towards me. They stop above me. Strange sounds like music are heard, but it’s difficult to tell if the sounds are from musical instruments (at least what we’re familiar with) or machines.
All this time, during this experience, I think it’s really happening. Then I remember I’m dreaming. Or am I? I must be. Of course I am. I’m confused. Within the dream I dream again. And here I tell Jim (my boyfriend at the time, my spouse now) all about the dream. He believes me. All of it. I tell him that the UFOs are real, “I just know they are.” No doubt. No argument. I tell him: “Well, I guess I really saw a UFO, it happens, and it just did to me.”
This time, in this dream, I wasn’t frightened, as I had been in the past in other dreams. I did feel awe, however, not in a religious sense (no space brother-sister Close Encounters stuff) but simply in an “this is incredible” sense.
We were living in Eugene, Oregon at this time. This before where we moved a few miles away and I had my orange orb and missing time experience. I did have a lot of weird UFO alien type dreams — was having them in Los Angeles when I met Jim, where we had missing time and a possible sighting — I find it interesting these dreams started before this. This suggests my experiences have been with me since childhood. Jim, who has had his own UFO related experiences, also since childhood; I have often commented how our experiences are not as random as we might think at times.
I was very close with someone all through elementary school and high school. I’ll call her Fiona. We went through a lot together; her family was rich, lived in a gated community, father some kind of scientist at a well known Big Science Private Sector institution, but I forget which one. She was unhappy; something very off about both her parents. I even went to counseling with her and her family a few times. I regret that, due to my own issues (sex, drugs, rock and roll. Not being trite here, but sad to say, a trio of self-destructive behaviors) when I was in my late teens, early twenties, our last couple of visits were not good ones due to my own self-indulgence. But since then, this person is the only one from my childhood that appears when I think of my childhood experiences involving UFOs.
Sometimes Fiona shows up in my dreams involving UFOs. Or she just appears during a memory of a UFO related memory. No one else, not my god-sister, (or my own sisters), or other friends, just Fiona. The question is, why?
I do not have any memory of Fiona and I seeing a UFO together, or experiencing anything of a paranormal nature.
We spent a lot of time on the roof of her ten (twelve?) story apartment tower. Late at night, sitting up there, watching the skies. Does the fact her father was a scientist play into this? Does any of this mean anything at all? Who knows of course. It could also be nothing at all, of no account, and Fiona’s appearance in my memories, dream realm or otherwise, means nothing.
Just another odd fragment within this giant, multi-faceted sphere of UFO experience.